trips + treats: Powder Pigs

Last week, Scott and I were so lucky to both have the same day off! Scott has been dying to go snowboarding. He's also been dying for me to go with him. Uncle Donald can attest to this...I just don't have the desire to fling myself down a slippery mountain with the definite possibility that I will fall. And when Natasha Richardson died earlier this year after falling while skiing, let's just say Scott was disappointed in my answer, "NO."

But...He really really really wanted me to go, and I realized I need to not be so scared of life. (Needles are at the top of my list.)

So I went. And surprisingly, I was a little excited! A new adventure. We drove up to Targhee in Alta, WY. The roads were pretty good. We stopped for breakfast at the Bunkhouse Bistro (where it was freezing, seriously, i was shaking eating my Denver Omelette).

The drive from town to the slopes was gorgeous. The densely-packed, towering trees looked like they were sprinkled with powdered sugar from a giant colander in the skies. It was a beautiful day.

We park and dress. (I borrowed some friend's stuff but had to wear Scott's old pants--I looked like a thug.) We got our lift tickets then rented my ski stuff. No snowboarding for me. I felt like an idiot as the girl is explaining everything to me. She would ask me a question and I would have to say, "Uhh. I don't know. Don't remember. The last time I went skiing I was probably 12." I felt like I was 12.

So I get strapped into my boots and feel like Mr. Roboto as I clunk around awkwardly trying, but failing, to carry my equipment. My skis and poles are flinging everywhere and Scott is warning people to give me room as I try to watch the pros and see how they carry them easily.I kept pleading to Scott for help, but he was of no use. "I don't know," he said about a million times. "I've never skiied before."

We get to the start of the Bunny Hill path. (I wasn't feeling that adventurous. Black Diamonds, Blue Squares, they're all the same to me, and at that point they all spelled death.) So I step into my skiis and hear the CLICK. Then I have a horrible, sickening realization. I'm stuck. How do I get out? Panic. What if I need to get out and I can't?! Help! Seriously, I had a little bit of a panic attack. I couldn't remember how to get out and the girl had not told me. Scott didn't know. I freaked a little.

So I did a little more skiier watching and finally saw how to get out of them. duh. Use your poles to release them at the back of the binding. All good. For now.

We get to the lift, and I'm too slow, so the lift guy has to frantically reach a button before I'm side-blinded and catapulted into the snow by the lift. Embarassing. He says with a chuckle, "You gotta be a little faster and get to the line." Really? You don't say?! Thanks for the advice Einstein. I would've if I COULD'VE!

Scott apologized. He thought I knew how to get on the lift. 12! I was 12 when I last did this! I don't know anything!

I guess that's not entirely true. I remembered one thing--angle your skies inward to a point--that means SLOW. I'm good with SLOW. We've been life-long buddies. So SLOW and I hang out all day.

Scott was so sweet to me though. I know he was dying to go a little faster and jump into that powder, but he stayed with me as best he could and steered clear of the powder because it made my skis wiggle and then I'd take a tumble. That was probably a hilarious sight. I was literally a powder pig three times and I didn't find it to be pleasant. What's the word? Oh yeah...mortifying. That was another thing the girl neglected to tell me. How do I get up? I had no idea. And boy is it hard. I sat on my butt and tried to use my poles as a means to hoist my bod up. No good. Too tiring. So I had to reposition. No good either. That hurts. I felt like my ankles were going to snap under the weight of my constricting boots and long awkward skis. Finally, I found a good position on my side and using all my strength got up. It was probably a good ten minutes of knee-slapping entertainment for everyone watching.

Aside from all the little mishaps and internal meltdowns. I had a blast! I was so surprised that I had fun. The snow fell softly as we glided down the mountains, I got braver with each run and eventually ditched my pal SLOW (he was holding me back) and started going pretty fast. I even started to weave like you're supposed to. But the best part was sipping hot chocolate together in the Lodge, watching the snow fall and pointing out the hilarious "Dumb and Dumber" snow outfits that some people wear.

It was a fun adventure spent with my best friend.